Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Send in the Clowns

We need a few funny stories. Do you have any Christmas favorites or stories of your children saying something funny? Some good, clean, uplifting stories would be appreciated. We would welcome a knock-knock joke, too. Thank you for your continued prayers.

Comments:
  1. Sandy Says:

    Sending lots of hugs and prayers your way! And here’s a cute little poem that someone sent me:

    Snowball

    I made myself a snowball
    as perfect as could be.
    I thought I’d keep it as a pet
    and let it sleep with me.
    I made it some pajamas
    and a pillow for its head.
    Then last night it ran away,
    but first, it wet the bed!

  2. Trisha Ferris Says:

    You asked for it. Here goes.

    Knock ,Knock
    Who’s there?
    Hannah
    Hannah who?
    Hannah partridge in a pear tree

    Knock , Knock
    Who’s there? Wayne
    Wayne who?
    Wayne in a manger

    Knock, Knock
    Who’s there?
    Donut
    Donut who?
    Donut open til Christmas

    Knock, Knock
    Who’s there?
    Wenceslas
    Wenceslas who?
    Wenceslas train home?

    Knock, Knock
    Who’s there?
    Dexter
    Dexter who?
    Dexter halls with bough of holly

    Knock, Knock
    Who’s there?
    Avery
    Avery who?
    Avery Merry Christmas

  3. Aunt Carrie Says:

    Here’s a little Christmas day story:
    When Laurel was little, she unwrapped a video that she had been wanting.
    Hopping around she exclaimed, “This is my favorite movie! I’ve never seen this movie!”

    With prayers,
    Aunt Carrie

  4. Rebekah Wolfe Says:

    Zeke said something really funny this summer. Jonathan’s mom brought some shrimp cocktail over one day for dinner. I put a few shrimp on his plate. He took one look at them and said to me, “Mommy, I do not like worms. I do not eat worms. I will not eat those worms!” I laughed and laughed. Well, a few days later he saw a commercial for Red Lobster’s 20 shrimp plate. He looked at me and said, “Mommy, they don’t call them worms any more, now they call them shrimp!” I asked him if he would eat them now that they were called shrimp. He said, “NO, they are still worms even if they are called shrimp.” So there is a 2 year old’s perspective on shrimp. I hope you enjoyed it!

  5. Dawn Says:

    These are great! Please keep them coming. Katy sees her GI doctor tomorrow again. Her day was very difficult. The laughter helps so much.

  6. lburk Says:

    HI ..we had about four inches of snow today in Md. Of course our county was the only county that didn’t release the schools early. We are praying for a late opening in the am. My students are studying penguins this week. We had an experiment today to see what would slide on a block of ice. There were many laughs as we predicted whether popcorn, paperclip, yarn, cottonball, block, etc. would slide. At the end of the activity we added our results and labeled the one with more and the one with less. What a fun way to watch some ice melt and use math words appropriately. This is also D week so we read a book about dinosaurs and then drew a dinosaur and labeled its parts. Our students are counting down the days to Dec. 25. I know Katie is busy teaching Qavah and Annalese new things. I loved the picture album of the baby’s first year. Keep those pictures coming Katie, GREAT JOB!!!!!!!!!! We pray for your healing every day.
    hugs and kisses………….Linda

  7. Care Says:

    Hi. I haven’t posted before, but I have been reading Katie’s story. I found my way here through Heather’s blog. I have three sons, and my 6 year old (Ethan) has delta storage pool deficiency (but not HPS.) We were at the NIH last year - and got to meet the fabulous Sandy there. I wanted to post, and add my prayers for Katie, and share a story from a conversation with Ethan that took place last February…

    E: Mom, do angels die?
    Me: No sweetie, angels are angels forever.
    E: But you don’t know that for sure, right?
    Me: Uh, well, no….I won’t know that until I get there, and hopefully that is a long time away
    E: God’s son died. I am so sad for him.
    Me: Well Jesus is in Heaven with God now.
    E: He died. God was sad when he died.
    Me: I think he probably was.
    E: When I go to heaven I am never going to have to sleep. Because angels don’t need to sleep. God doesn’t sleep. And God will have food that is good for me because he knows all about my allergies.
    Me: Sweetheart, when you go to Heaven your body will be all healed and you won’t have allergies any more.
    E: You mean I can eat anything I want?
    Me: You betcha.
    E: Oh yeah, well, when I’m an angel I am going to fly into people’s houses when their windows are open.
    Me: You are?
    E: Yes. I’m going to check their smoke detectors to make sure the batteries are working. All angels do this. God even does this.
    Me: Okay, well that is a great way to help protect people.
    E: But you can come visit me.
    Me: In heaven???
    E: No. *long suffering sigh* In Ohio.
    Me: You are going to check smoke detectors in Ohio? (really getting confused)
    E: Mooooommmmm. I’m going to go to college there.
    Me: Oh, so we are talking about college now and not angels?
    E: *shaking head from side to side* Mom, you need to really pay attention. Are you ears turned on?

  8. Jennifer S. :-) Says:

    Katy,
    We are praying for you. I’m sorry that you’re having such a rough time. I have a funny story even though it doesn’t have anything to do with Christmas. This past Sunday at church, one of the mothers came in with her son. One of the other children, Elijah, was in church and the mother whispered to her son, “Look Liam–Elijah’s here to play with you!” To this little Liam, remembering his Bible stories, replied, “You mean the one from the BIBLE???” It really was too funny. ;)
    Love and prayers,
    Jen :)

  9. Lillian Oliveira Says:

    I don’t have a funny kid’s story, but here is a funny kids’ song that you might teach Qavah. You can play it with one finger on the piano. Doris, can you pick this up and give them the sequential notes to play for this? It does the scale up and down, but starts in the middle.

    A plump little Robin flew down from a tree
    And looked for a worm which he’d happened to see.
    A frisky young chicken came scampering by
    And gazed at the robin with
    wondering eye.

    “Can you sing?” said the robin;
    the chicken said “No’ and asked in its turn
    if the robin could crow.
    The the bird sought the tree and the chicken the wall
    and each thought the other knew
    nothing at all!

    I’m also going to see if I can find a book I have about life as a young priest in England, assisting a rotund and wily older priest. It’s supposed to be (mostly) true and is probably the funniest book I have ever read. Had me in convulsions.

    And by the way, I’m with Zeke on the shrimp! I DO NOT EAT WORMS EITHER!

    Love and prayers, Aunt Lil

  10. Aunt Carrie Says:

    Here is another Christmas story. (I hope I didn’t post this last year. I remember just after we got our power back Raleigh and I posted, but it didn’t go through.)

    Last year we had a BIG wind storm here in the northwest. (Hmm we just had another big storm mostly rain this time. December is becoming quite a “festive” month.) Our power was out for 7 full days just before Christmas. (I was expecting ~20 people for Christmas dinner, but not in the dark! We had three or four days to clean up all the stuff we couldn’t see in the dark and that we had been planning to do with child labor when school was out…but that’s a different story.)

    We didn’t yet have our tree when the storm hit and we were more concerned with keeping warm and having enough fluffy socks. (At least our kids amused themselves with books and fire-building. Our neighbors sent their sons over to borrow some GameBoys so they could have some peace.) At any rate, we looked at all the downed trees (5 trees at least 8 inches in diameter and 3 were more like 18 inches in diameter and 80 feet tall) and decided the tops of one of those babies would make a great Christmas tree. Unfortunately, the best one was the victim of some rare but exuberant branch trimming…oops sorry Mom…

    The second best was almost as grand. Well maybe more grand actually. We had to keep cutting and cutting on it to get it to fit in the house. We have a cathedral ceiling in the living room and it reached the top. What we hadn’t really counted on was that the branches on a tree that tall are almost as long as the top we had trimmed. It opened up kinda like the tree in “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation” but more spindly. We didn’t bust out any windows, but there was definately not room for 20 people in the living room…more like 2 if they cuddled close and didn’t try to go anywhere.

    Eventually, Uncle Dave tied up the branches. It made the tree appear more full and we were able to walk around it. It was a very unique tree!

    That is the best place to stop, because it came to a rather sadder end. A tree that size is pretty heavy. You really can’t leave the water dish unattended for very long. One day shortly after Christmas, there was a tremendous crash and it re-enacted its life of a week or so before. (I don’t know maybe it was MEANT to be on the ground.

    The good news is very few ornaments that we cared about had to be sacrificed. The bad news is some of the damaged ones were the Christmas mice that Dawn made with the names of me and my four sisters. I couldn’t bear to throw any of my sisters (..er mice) away! So they will go up cracked and chipped this year telling each other the story of their wild ride last year. (Besides my sisters check for their mouse and get very offended if I put theirs behind were they can’t see it, thinking I have left it off.)

    Aunt Carrie

  11. Aunt Carrie Says:

    Okay that reminded me of one more. One of the youth at church told me that one year the cats would just not leave the Christmas tree alone as the family decorated. The cats were not usually so pesty regarding the tree and the family could not figure out why they were so interested this year. Finally, they built a barricade to keep the cats out so they could finish decorating.

    In the middle of the night there was a big crash. The cats had gotten through the barricade and brought down the tree. Finally, the family saw what the cats had known all along.

    A bird’s nest was still in the tree.

    Hope you are feeling much much much better Katy!

    Love and prayers,
    Aunt Carrie

  12. Jennifer Blugerman Says:

    At Thanksgiving, my Brother and Sister-in-Law gave Matt his early birthday present. He received a really cool ball with a long ribbon attached, called a “Rooster Tail” like one that he had played with at their house the last time we went to Charlotte. The other item he received, which he had also played with at their home and loved, was a timeless classic….a Whoopie Cusion!! Delighted, he (and Emma) immediately began exploring all the possibilities that a Whoopie Cusion affords. All through our home for the next few days we could hear the melodious echos of that charming toy followed by uproarious laughter and cackling from Emma & Matt. At one point, I was in the kitchen and could hear Matt in the den. Once again, I heard the “Phooooot!” of the cusion, and then Matt calmly and very matter-of-factly exclaim, “I like this thing.” It was as if he had tested the product enough at that point to finally be able to render an unbiased analysis, “Yes, this is indeed a good thing of which I approve.”

    Ah, boyhood. Thanks, Brother, for the gift! Payback time is coming, so beware!!! ;-)

    -Jen

  13. Aunt Julie Says:

    I just got back from seeing the Fleece’s in Columbus. Isaac is always great for a laugh. I was looking at a Nativity picture he had on the refrigerator and said “Isaac can you tell me about this picture?” He told me that it was Mary and Joseph. I asked him who was in the manger and he said “God”. I continued to ask him about the picture and he identified the angels, the wisemen and the shepherds. So then I went back to the baby and said “And who is this?” He said again that it was God. We laughed and his mom finally got him to remember that God’s name as a baby was Jesus. So cute - and so right!

  14. Aunt Julie Says:

    Here’s another Isaac story. He had gotten a little container of TicTacs at the store on Tuesday night. By Wednesday morning, they were all gone. His mom said he had eaten too many and he said “I had REALLY bad breath.”

  15. Doris Harriff Says:

    I’ll do my best here. As Lily said, it starts in the middle of the scale, then to C above middle C, down sort-of in triplets, back up again, etc. At the end of the 4th phrase, the last note drops an octave. All notes are quarter notes except at the end of each phrase where they are half notes. 6-8 time. I hope you can decipher it! It repeats, of course, for the second verse.

    GCCCBBBAAAG
    GFFFEEEDDDC
    CDDDEEEFFFG
    GAAABBBCCCC

    Too bad I couldn’t just put the music staff here & do it right!

  16. Doris Harriff Says:

    Oops, I made a mistake! The notes are OK, it is just that at the end of the 4th phrase the last 3 notes drop down an octave.

  17. Grandma & Granddad Says:

    Hi Katy, Paul, and Dawn,

    We just received this from my niece, Mary Louise. It’s not about Christmas, but it’s kind of cute.

    CHURCH CATS

    A mother looked out a window and saw her son playing church with their three kittens.
    A while later she heard meowing and scratching on the door. She went to the window to see him baptizing the kittens.
    She opened the window and said, “Stop that, you’ll drown those kittens.” He looked at her and said with much conviction in his voice……..

    “They should have thought of that before they joined my church”

    Love and Prayers,
    Grandma & Grandad

  18. Trisha Ferris Says:

    When our daughter was almost 3 years old, we cut our own Christmas tree from some property we had just bought. We were so proud to put up a tree from our own land. The problem was that the only suitably sized trees were right on the edge of a heavily wooded section & only had limbs on the front view of the trees. No problem, we thought. We’ll just put the tree right up against the wall & decourate it & it’ll look great. Jennifer loved the tree & kept tugging on the ornaments, causing the front-heavy tree to topple down on top of her. After a few crashes, we wired the tree to the wall to secure it. The next year we were able to cut another tree from our own land. Thaat time we were smarter & we cut 2 front-heavy trees & wired them together forming a beautiful. whole, stable tree.

  19. Barbara Walker Says:

    When Virg was just a young boy, his Mother planted some pansies bought from their uncle who owned a greenhouse. Being the helpful little boy that he was, when he heard about an upcoming rainshower, he did the logical and pulled up all the pansies so that they wouldn’t get wet! He doesn’t remember if there was a punishment but I’d bet if there was one it was done with a chuckle.

    He also has memories of haircuts. He was born with a tongue attached to the bottom of his mouth and when taken to the doctor to get it repaired, he remembers the doctor just snipping it with scissors which was hurtful. So, you can imagine when his mother tried to get his hair cut the fit he must have pitched. In lieu of this, his mother would enlist the help of her neighbor friend who would hold Virgil’s head firmly between very strong knees and his mother would literally give him a bowl cut with a bowl placed on his head that she cut around!

    Some things you just don’t forget!!!

    Love - Barb

  20. Karen Tillman Says:

    Hey gang, I know it has been awhile between posts, but I am battling my own HPS, and pyoderma gangrenosum demons myself, but I do have a funny story to tell, but it doesn’t have to do with Christmas. Hope it helps.
    I used to teach a group of kids about the age of 2-5. The different age groups would arrive every 20 minutes. Anyway, my 4 year olds were the neatest and gave new meaning to out of the mouths of babes. One day I took them on a pretend picnic, so that we could give God thanks for food, and other things that he created. Anyway, we walked from our room to the room next door, where I had put together fake trees, park benches, and the like.
    As we arrived, I got everyone to help. We spread out our HUGE picnic blanket, and I began to hand out napkins. I told the kids to be sure to put the napkins on their laps with the food, so the ants wouldn’t get it. About that time one little kid’s eyes got big around with excitement, and shouted out loud, “My house is full of ants!!” To which I responded, really, and of coarse by the end of our little picnic every child’s house had ants!!! I thought it was truly adoreable!!! Chilodren are truly one of God’s greatest gifts!!

  21. Annie Says:

    OK, this just happened today. I work in sleep research. We had a meeting today. In attendance were doctors, statistician, nurse. We were talking about using saliva for dna collection. The PI said to make sure the participants rinse their mouths out with water before spitting so there is no protein/dna from food in the sample and so it doesn’t get confused with the human dna when analyzed…. For example pork would be bad b/c we wouldn’t want to think their parents are pigs or something. haha….that got a few laughs coming from the doctor. Well then, I went on to say… ahhh, that’s it! That explains all the snoring in our sleep apnea participants! No wonder there is so much snoring! Then i continued to digress and snorted/snored/oinked like a pig. Anyways, a typically non laughter filled group of people at a weekly meeting busted into laughter! And then I realized what I just did and got beet red! But it was pretty funny, at least at the time and well worth it I think. I never made my boss laugh like that before.

    I hope you are feeling better Katy and I hope you and your family have a wonderful Christmas season! Squeeze little Annelise for me. I enjoyed your photoshow of her first year.

    Annie

  22. Chris Griffith Says:

    When I was 14 years old my folks had family and friends over for Christmas dinner. We lived in a small apartment. There was only room for one tiny table in the kitchen. Although it was packed with scrumptious food, there was barely room to sit. My brother and I being the low people on the totem pole, ate on the floor in the hallway beside the kitchen. We had many good things to eat: Dressing, green beans, mashed potatoes, sweet potato pie and a suculent roast and many other tasty morsels.

    We had gone most of the day without eating, so when dinnertime came, my brother and I were quite hungry. We sat on the floor and stuffed our faces!

    About halfway into the first plate of food, I took an exceptionally big bite of beef. I gave the lucious lump of meat a few quick chews and swallowed. Unfortunately, the beef got stuck just as it started to go down. I found this quite curious and decided to tell my brother. Very quickly, I experienced the curious sensation of not being able to tell him. I was unable to speak! You see, you need air to exit your mouth in order to be able to speak, and I was unable to do that because of that big bite of beef stuck in my wind pipe.

    Panic soon had me in its snare and I stood up from the floor. My brother saw fear in my eyes and followed me into the kitchen. The guests and family were talking and eating and having an all around festive time when I walked into their presence. Their attention all turned to me. I had a wild look on my face and my mouth was moving up and down, but no words came out.

    My brother soon appeared behind me and with ferocious strength, lowered a clinched fist down onto my back. This caused the big bite of beef to eject from my mouth onto the middle of the table where it landed with something like a splat. This all happened so quickly that folks were still removing forks from their mouth when it hit. I’m not sure if they were more surprised at my choking or the fact that a person could actually swallow something so large!

    The sound of that meat smacking the table was music to my ears and the feel of air rushing into my lungs was exhilerating!

    Since then, I have chewed my food with a little more caution, especially when I eat roast beef!

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